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Thoughts on the old year, and the new year.

Thoughts on the old year, and the new year.

Since about 2005, I've been doing this thing where at the end of December, I look back through my email/facebook posts/spotty memory and write down all the significant things that happened during the course of the year. It helps me have a better grip on time's passing and a better understanding of exactly what it is I'm doing with my life, and it usually helps me see that I'm actually less lazy than I sometimes fear that I am. So I did that tonight. And it turns out 2012 was pretty monumental. A year ago, I'd just opened an etsy shop and was tentatively calling myself an illustrator in a very quiet voice, although I was much more comfortable with the phrase "Sometimes I draw things." As I write this, I'm sitting here on Hour 7 of feeding paper into my Epson, printing orders for my 3-day feature sale on Fab.com. That doesn't mean I'm sitting at the top of some gigantic illustration empire or anything - far from it. I'm still in my beginning! An illustration baby! But something significant happened for me this year, in addition to working my ass off. At some point -- I can't say when -- I experienced a shift in my story. You know: the story each of us tells ourselves about who we are, what we're about, and what we can do. For a long time, I referred to the story as "reality." But now I'm not so sure. The story is changing, because I am changing it. My motto for 2013 is "Surrender and show up." (I'm sure it'll make it onto a print at some point, if for no other reason than I want to look at it every day.) I have big goals and dreams for next year, but at the heart of them are those two things. Surrender to the person I really am, to the plans the universe has for me, to the knowledge that everything will be OK. Show up authentically and honestly for myself and for others; show up because nothing happens unless I get off my ass and do it. I made business cards today. They list my position as "illustrator, designer, truth-teller." I look forward to living up to them in 2013.